Dalhousie was kind enough to put a handy dining etiquette guide online. Thought it’s likely aimed at students it’s so long that we didn’t even really read it. Now there’s nothing wrong with being polite, though, we just thought we’d trim it down to the essentials for you.
Nametags
In many situations you will have to wear a nametag to identify yourself and your affiliation. Nametags serve an important purpose and should be worn on the right hand side of your front shoulder area. Do not clip nametags to the bottom of your jacket. Wearing the nametag on the right-hand side of your shoulder immediately enables a person to see your name, particularly as you are shaking hands. If the nametag is on a cord worn around your neck, be sure to adjust the length so it can be easily seen. If writing your own nametag, write in large, clear letters so that it can be easily read by others.
Nametags let people know who you are. Lanyard-style nametags make you look especially official. If you have stickers you may put up to one sticker on your nametag.
Napkin
When dining with others, place your napkin on your lap after everyone at your table has been seated. Do not shake the napkin open. As you remove your napkin from the table, open it below the table level and place it on your lap. If the napkin is large, angle the fold toward your waist so that crumbs may be brushed inside the fold. Never spit a piece of food into your napkin. Remove the food from your mouth using the same utensil it went in with. Place the piece of food on the edge of your plate. Exceptions to this are fish bones or seeds, which you may remove with your fingers. If you must leave a meal, do so between courses and place your napkin on your chair or to the left of your plate. When a meal is completed, place your napkin to the right of your plate – never on the plate.
Place napkin on your lap so you don’t spill things on your pants. Also use it to clean food off your mouth. If you know any napkin folding tricks it would be encouraged.
Table Setting
It can be very confusing to be presented with a variety of eating utensils (see below), but choosing the correct silverware is not as difficult as it may first appear. Knowledge of a formal table setting will allow you to focus on the conversation rather than what utensil to use. Remember to start at the outside and work your way in. If you have been given two forks which are the same size, begin with the fork on the outside. Many restaurants use the same size fork for both the salad and the main course. When doubting which bread plate or drinking glass is yours, remember that everything to your right, you drink, and everything to your left, you eat.
The table will already be set. Just watch someone else if you have to.
Utensils
Used utensils should never touch the table. The “resting” position for utensils is crossed on your plate, with the fork tines pointing down. This tells the waiter that you are not finished with your meal. Be careful how you hold your utensils. Do not make a fist around the handle of the utensil – a young child would grasp a utensil this way, not an adult. There are two acceptable ways to use a knife and fork: continental fashion and American standard. In continental fashion, the diner cuts the food, usually one bite at a time, and uses the fork in the left hand, tines pointing down, to spear the food and bring it to the mouth. In American standard, a few bites are cut, the knife is laid across the top of the plate, sharp edge toward you, and the fork is switched to the right hand, tines up to bring the food to the mouth. Do not cut more than two or three bites at a time.
Same as previous.
Glasses
A variety of types and sizes of glasses can be used throughout the meal. Remember that items to drink from will be located in the area above your knife and spoon. Coffee cups may also be located to the right of the knife and spoon.
Glasses will be served pre-filled, not to worry. Careful not to spill your drink.
Guest
If you are someone’s guest at a meal, let them take the lead ordering. Ask the person what he/she recommends or suggests . By doing this, you will learn price range guidelines and have an idea of what to order. Generally, ordering an item in the mid-price range is best. Avoid foods that are sloppy or hard to eat. Also keep in mind that the person who initiates the meal will generally pick up the tab. Remember to thank them for the meal.
Be polite to your guests and have a good time. Introduce them to your other friends. Offer them things.
Buffets
Buffets provide you with an opportunity to select items you enjoy. Do not overload your plate and be sure to select a balanced variety of food items.
Take a clean plate each time. Try and choose food items that are normally expensive. Don’t waste food.
Pre-Set Meals
With a pre-set meal, the host/hostess has already made the menu selections and the individuals are served automatically. If you are allergic to certain foods, eat in religious conscience or are a vegetarian, quietly deal with while he/she is at your side. For vegetarians, ask if you may have a vegetable plate; with allergies or religion, provide the server with some options (ex. allergic to shellfish – ask if they have cod or flounder and be ready with your preference). This lets the server know what you can eat. Always eat a little of all items served to you.
You can probably start eating right away.
Served
Wait for everyone at your table to be served before beginning to eat. However, if an individual who has not been served encourages you to begin eating, you may do so. Eat slowly while waiting for his/her food to be served.
Wait until one other person starts eating.
Soup
When eating soup, think of making a circle: spoon the soup away from you, bring your spoon around to your mouth and back to the bowl. Soup is taken from the side of the soup spoon – it is not inserted into your mouth. If soup is too hot, wait for it to cool before eating. Don’t blow on it. Do no slurp or make noises when eating soup. Do not leave the spoon in the bowl; place the spoon on the plate beneath. Never crumble crackers into your soup. Take a bit of cracker, then some soup.
Don’t slurp and probably don’t drink from the bowl. Also towards the end bowl, it’s actually proper to scoop away form you.
Sorbet
This item is often served between courses to cleanse the palate. It is a light, sherbet texture and depending on when served, may be eaten with a fork or a spoon.
Is awesome.
Passing
Pass “community food” (such as the breadbasket, salt and pepper and salad dressing) to the right. Only pass to your immediate left if you are the closest to the item requested. Always pass the salt and pepper together. When passing items such as a creamer, a syrup pitcher or a gravy boat, pass them item with the handle pointing toward the recipient.
Pass people things when asked, pass bread and food to the person who didn’t pass it to you.
Seasoning
Always taste your food first before using any seasonings. Do not assume it needs to be seasoned.
Season/sauce to your liking. Don’t use too much salt though, it’s bad for you.
Bread
Bread/rolls should never be eaten whole. Break them into smaller, more manageable pieces, buttering only a few bites at a time. Butter should be taken from the butter dish and placed on the bread plate, not directly on the bread. Toast and garlic bread, however, may be eaten as whole pieces because they are usually already buttered. If you are served a piping hot muffin or biscuit, you may break in half crosswise, butter it and put it back together. However, when you are ready to actually eat, break it into small pieces.
Eat bread if you like, it’s totally ok to use butter or dip it in things, just remember reasonable bites.
Dessert Utensils
Dessert utensils may be found placed across the top of the place setting. Slide these utensils down for use after the main course is removed (fork to the left and spoon to the right).
Desert utensils are smaller. It’s a little late now though because they’re the ones left over.
Sweeteners
Do not be excessive with sugar or sweetener packets. The rule of thumb is to use no more than two packets per meal. Do not crumble the packets: partially tear off a corner of the packet, empty its contents and place it to the side.
Use if desired where appropriate.
Alcohol
Alcohol, if consumed at all, should only be consumed in moderation. In most cases, you may have a drink during the social hour and wine(s) with the dinner. You do not have to finish your drink. In fact, slow sipping is recommended. If you do not want an alcoholic drink, politely decline the offer.
Know your limit. Start with a foundation of good food, particularly things with starches like potatoes or nachos.
Finished
When finished with a course, leave your plate in the same position that it was presented to you. In other words, do not push your plates away or stack them. Lay your fork and knife diagonally across your plate, with the blade pointing towards you, side-by-side. The knife and fork should be placed as if they are pointing to the numbers 10 and 4 on a clock face.
When you are finished someone will likely remove your plate.
Restaurant Staff
The wait staff, servers, Maitre’d, etc. are your allies. They can assist you with whatever problem may arise. Quietly get their attention and speak to them about the issue at hand.
Be nice, especially if they’re nice to you.
Eating
- Bring food to your mouth, not mouth to the food.
- Chew with your mouth closed.
- Take small bites so you can carry on a conversation without the delay of chewing and swallowing large amounts of food; do not talk with your mouth full.
- If food spills off your plate, you may pick it up with a piece of your silverware and place it on the edge of your plate.
- Keep your elbows off the table when eating. You may rest your arms up to the forearms on the table, although it is best to keep one hand on your lap, except when cutting food.
Enjoy your food, take sensible bites, elbows are ok on the table now. Talk about the food if it gets too silent all of a sudden.
Other Dinner Table Tips
- Do not blow your nose at the table. Quietly excuse yourself and go to the washroom.
- Turn your head and cover your mouth if you have to sneeze or cough.
- Do not leave your personal belongings on the table.
- Do not apply makeup while at the table, or use a toothpick to clean your teeth. Excuse yourself and go the washroom.
- Turn your cell phone off!
^ These are good, actually.
Follow these simple guidelines and soon people will be crawling over the table (inappropriate etiquette by the way) to offer you business.
(Original article: http://careerservicescentre.dal.ca/default.asp?mn=1.90.847.854.929)
